For a long time, family and neighbors were fascinated by the mystery of an individual woman who, every year always receiving an arrangement of flowers for her birthday. Each bouquet was accompanied by the same message: “From your secret admirer.”
The people around her always smiled, as if they believed that she was a romantic mate or a romantic love affair, or perhaps a lifelong admirer who loved her from far away. They never corrected her, she just smiled and arranged the flowers with pride in her kitchen table.
After her death her children discovered the heartbreaking fact. As they sorted through her belongings they discovered receipts and delivery records that showed that she was sending flowers to herself for years. It was as if the “secret admirer” had never been born.
“She just wanted to feel loved, to feel remembered,” her daughter later said. “It breaks my heart that she had to create that for herself… but it also shows how much she longed for joy.”
The story touched a chord with a lot of people who had heard about the news. Social media platforms, people reacted with a mixture of sorrow and awe–sadened by the fact that she felt alone, yet enthralled by her determination to bring joy into her own lives.
Psychologists believe that the act is a reflection of an innate human need for love and appreciation. “Sometimes people create rituals to fill emotional voids,” one grief counselor said. “In her case, sending herself flowers may have been a way to remind herself that she was worthy of love, even if no one else showed it.”
The children of her deceased mother now want to carry on the tradition to honor her memory and vow that they will continue to have fresh flowers be laid on her grave every year, on her birthday. They will not be from an “secret admirer,” but from the people who realized how much she wanted to be recognized.
